014 A No-Baby Bender, Postpartum Bodies, and a Book Tour
Your source of inspiration as we navigate the journey of motherhood. Think chicken soup for "mommy brain".
Based on the new way I’ve been approaching my time (as I wrote about in the last post, 013), I’ve carved out more hours for writing… so here comes my next Motherhood Muses, just a week after the last! My very own Mama Milestone.
Also, more time for writing as I’m staying indoors with the A/C blasting, given this sweltering weather. I can’t believe that this time last year, I was “sidewalk/pavement stepping” through the heat, nine months pregnant, doing anything to bring on labour. Wild times, but such phenomenal memories.
Thank you for reading, and enjoy! (For those who haven’t already, be sure to subscribe below!)
A No-Baby Bender
It’s not every weekend that you go from hosting a pre-drinks, to the 1 Hotel rooftop party, to an East Village underground disco, followed by a lazy river tubing trip in the Pocono Mountains the next day, only to end up at Medieval Times in New Jersey. But yes, I did that. This mum did that!
(So no, not your typical “bender” but collectively the longest time I’d been away from my baby. Two evenings in a row and a full day, plus there was alcohol involved, so it feels like an appropriate choice of wording.)
Of course, I’ve had nights out since I had my baby, but it has taken a while (longer than I thought) to really enjoy that part of my life again.
What the F do I wear? Will Maelie be up in the night when I get back? Will I survive a hangover? What do I talk about? Will I be contactable while on the river? Will my friends secretly want to ship me home in a taxi, like Miranda in Sex and the City, once she became a mum?
This weekend, I reclaimed all of that. (I actually sent myself home in a cab both nights while my friends danced on). My weekend of fun, perfectly timed to the first official day of summer, left me feeling reconnected and more myself.
Camille Styles recently wrote about “Reclaiming the Magic of a Summer Camp State of Mind”, and three ideas resonated with me:
Reframe adventure: The heart of any adventure is stepping into the unknown. Such as the fear of when someone mentioned rapids on the lazy river!
Let yourself play: Remember how good it feels to lose yourself in an activity where the end goal isn’t mastery or capitalizing on a side hustle, but sheer enjoyment.
Tap into who you (really) are: Perhaps the greatest lure of summer camp is shedding the insecurities and emerging as your best self.
This weekend did all three, and the combination helped me experience both the wildness and tenderness of reclaiming fun post-baby perfectly.
Big shout out to my wonderful husband, Joe, for taking on all parenting duties for those 36 hours! Can I book you in again next weekend?
And I’ve got to share the genius move that was using the stroller as a bar cart….
A Mix of Musings
Following Shuffle_Mamas’ Instagram — I mean, WOW! These two mums in the same neighbourhood took up shuffling once they had their babies. As they put it, “We’re 2 mamas with zero dance background who decided to learn how to shuffle in 2020. And it was the best pandemic decision ever. Here we are 4 years later, still keeping our weekly dance sessions sacred and so much happier and healthier because of it❤️”.
They have a Beginner’s course, if anyone wants to do it with me!
Reading (and admiring) Ready or Not’s “What a postpartum body really looks like” Post — At a time where it’s baking heat in New York and everyone is wearing next to nothing, this was a refreshing reminder to be accepting of my new body and what it created! Lucinda has included a ton of photos of her new tummy, rather than hiding it away, and writes: Why is it that we don’t make as much space for accepting our new bodies as we do our new lives, and priorities, and identities?
Mama’s Milestones
Chelsey Scaffidi | Mama of 2, Author of The Mother Year and Substack
One Mama Milestone I’m proud of?
Leaving my babies for 36 hours… without guilt.
It was just a quick stop in LA on the book tour. I kissed them goodbye, boarded the plane, and let myself fully show up for the dream I had carried through midnight feedings and postpartum fog.
No spiral of guilt. No frantic checking. Just trust.
In my babies. In their dad. In myself.
This stop felt different. Like a culmination. I was there to share the book I wrote in the rawness of early motherhood - a book born from voice notes recorded in the blurry, becoming moments. And standing in that room, I felt it: clarity.
The conversations, the energy, the women - it all reminded me that none of it was random. Every job I had before kids, every version of myself I thought I’d outgrown - it was all being woven into the tapestry of now.
And here’s the thing: I missed my babies. Of course I did.
But I didn’t feel guilty. And if you’re a mom, you know that’s a quiet kind of miracle.
Because mom guilt isn’t like regular guilt - it’s sneaky and sticky, heavy even. It whispers that love means never leaving. That devotion should look like constant closeness.
But I’m learning that love can stretch. That presence isn’t just about proximity, it’s about showing up whole, wherever you are.
That’s what I did.
I let myself feel lit up. I spoke from the fire God placed in my belly. And I let it be enough.
That’s a milestone I’ll carry for a long, long time -
a reminder that I get to be me, too, in the sacred midst of being theirs.
What do you think? Comment below or email/message me with your musings, and I’d love to feature them if you’re open to it!
That stroller bar cart 😍 and love the mama milestone series, thank you for the opportunity to share! 🕊️